"Rerun Guy"
This peep, speaking at a sheva brachos, announces that he's repeating a speech most of the guests heard at last night's wedding, because the panim chadashos missed it. He then proceeds to repeat the entire speech verbatim. At least, that's what he claims.
"The Starving Host"
This peep lines up a number of speakers at the sheva brachos he's hosting. He speaks last. All of the speeches are before dinner is served. He asserts: "Rather than letting you eat now and dreading my upcoming speech, I'd rather speak now and have you look forward to the food!"
"The Proud Mother"
Quote: "You play as good as my daughter!" We hope that's a compliment!