Poor iPhone guy. The wife shlepped him to a concert. Thankfully, having the iPhone along means he can play games/text/surf the entire time. No paying attention to the music/conversation with the spouse required. Thank God for technology!
This peep stands up at a Bat Mitzvah and tells the Bat Mitzvah girl, at simchas, people usually say that your nice attributes come from your parents, but "Rabbi xxxxx [the family's shul rabbi] says that its not the case here."
"The Desert Fresser"
This elderly peep totters past with a heaping plateful of desert containing multiples of each item on offer at the desert buffet. Thankfully, he doesn't tip all the way over.
"Surprise, We Changed Venues!"
These peeps change venues for the Sheva Brachos they are hosting a few days before the event. They neglect to inform the band, though. We find out after we park and unload our gear.
"The Benevolent Rebbe"
This "name" Chassidic Rebbe comes prepared for all contingencies. Knowing he's likely to be introduced to small kids at the wedding he's flown in for, he brings along candies... wrapped in custom printed "Bli Ayin Hora" wrappers.
"The Tasteless Video Editor"
This peep edits a video montage for display at a Bar Mitzvah. In a creative touch, they add historical scenes of interest that happened while the Bar Mitzvah was growing up. Tasteful scenes. Like a presidential inauguration, clips from various movies and ball games, Saddam Hussein's hanging, and NY. Governor Eliott Spitzer's resignation upon being caught cavorting with prostitutes. Yup. Very tasteful.