Shaina points out that the Taame Haminhagim says that one should be somber and, in fact, sobbing until after the Chupah. COOP is thankful that many have moved away from universally adopting that minhag. One of the points I tried to make in my original post is that those (like COOP) who are uncomfortable with the minhag of crying or shuckling under the chupah should not be so critical because, as Shaina notes, such a mehalech has a very strong basis in our mesorah.Something about the way this was phrased irked me so I loooked it up. In Siman 955, the Taamei Haminhagim gives the reason for the minhag to cry BEFORE the chuppa with "bechiya and hissorerus" UNTIL they stand under the chuppa ("ad hisyatzvam tachas hachuppa"), and immediately after the chuppa, to break a glass and be joyful ("v'teykef achar hacuppa shovrin hakos v'naasas rina ditza v'chedva"). So, even for those who follow this minhag -- and as COOP,another commenter, pointed out, it isn't universally accepted -- the "forced" crying under the chuppa seems to be a stretch.
Incidentally, if anyone can explain the reason the Taamei Haminhagim gives... I don't get it. He quotes from "Shearis Yisroel" that it has to do with the nitzotzos from the cheit of Odom Harishon, and that the time prior to the chupa is in the "bechina" of "haloch yelech u'bacho noseh meshech hazora" while the time after the chupa (where the breaking of the glass represents "sheviras haklipos") is in the "bechina" of "bo yavo b'rina nose alumosav." I don't understand the connections between Odom Harishon's cheit and the klipos created thereby to the pesukim of Shir Hama'alos, or why they are both tied to chupa.
